As I lay in my bed tossing and turning, I find that my worries of the day has followed me into my sleep. I dream a very vivid dream of being in a two story house with my two ‘roommates’ and it’s raining. Jack and Jill are very worried about the rain and until I look at the window on the second floor, I’m not, but then I see water beginning to raise above the window. This was the first of several times that I awoke from this very frightening dream. My circumstances are very real and relatable to my dream. I’ve sheltered and supported one other person for over a year and have recently took on a second. My income, from the world’s perspective, can barely support one person and is well below poverty level, much less three. But God… I love that – But God! Yes, God! He laid upon my heart 6 ½ years ago to help the homeless and has given me tremendous compassion for them. My niece tells me “Aunt Becky, you can’t keep doing this!” and my reply is “Baby, I don’t go out looking for them, God keeps bringing them to me.” But here’s the thing, I’m not completely dead yet.
Let me explain. Jesus died so that we can be restored into right relationship with the Father. When Adam and Eve sinned in the garden they took on a sinful nature – self. We were never created for ourselves, but for God and to glorify Him. Jesus tells us: “Then Jesus told His disciples, “If anyone would come after Me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me.” Matthew 16:24 Jesus died so that you may die to self, and start to live the abundant life the Father intended from the very beginning. So when I say I’m not dead yet, I mean I still put myself on the throne of my life and become worried about me and my wants, my needs, and my desires.
Jesus tells us in Matthew 6:25-34 not to worry – to seek His kingdom and righteousness first and God will take care of the rest. So what do we do when we get off balance and start trying to control things ourselves and worry creeps in? Take it to God! Tell Him whats going on in your head. It’s not a surprise to Him, but He can’t help you until you do. Remember and recount the many blessings He’s already done for you. This will help you to remember just how faithful and loving He is (this usually chases away any fear you’re having), and remind Him of His promises. God loves to be reminded of what He has said, actually I think He likes the fact that you remember what He has said. Know this: God is faithful to keep His word – NO MATTER WHAT! “I will not violate my covenant or alter what my lips have uttered.” Psalm 89:34
Yes, there are times that I put myself on the throne of my life and try to control things instead of giving it all to God, and when I do I love that the Holy Spirit is there to remind me that I’ve gotten off track and like a GPS, I need to reroute myself and surrender it all back to Him!